The winter holidays are a favorite time of mine, and I am normally relaxed and focused on nothing else but soaking up Christmas carols and movies, reading a couple of books, and eating delicious food. This year was not that different, except for the fact that I did a lot of thinking about my life. I have felt very stressed this past year, and I'm sure that most of my posts from the last six months show that in one way or another. I have been really busy, and I have often felt like I have not a single spare minute in a day to do something for pleasure or look at myself in the mirror.
Some of the people in my life have expressed the opinion that perhaps I am overreacting; after all, plenty of people work and study at the same time and don't feel like I do. I am not sure what to say to that. All I can say is that I am usually quite hard on myself, and I am generally not a complainer, so if I do complain, it's generally for a legitimate reason. I am trying to find a decent balance of work and play in my life, but lately it has been extremely hard and it bothers me. I feel really grateful for everything that I do have: my own home, nice parents, a guy that has been nothing but wonderful to me, to mention a few. I am just trying to find a way to live more, rather than do more.
I am looking to change a few things in my life in 2013. I am not going to mention some of them here, but I am going to talk about a big to-do item that I should check off my list, which is finally finish school. A lot of the other stuff follows from this one. So here they are, my Resolutions:
1. Graduate with an MBA by the end of the summer.
This one is a definite must. I need to finish studying ASAP or else I fear my brain will begin countdown to explosion. I write down all tasks and errands that I need to complete for work, school, and for home, but I catch myself forgetting one thing to make room for remembering another :). This coming term will be the hardest one yet - Strategic Financial Management and having to submit a full business plan for a new company, so I really need to be on top of my game for these. After that it's four marketing courses, and if all goes well, I should be done by the beginning of September. The next six to eight months are likely to be the hard, but I will have to push through.
Finishing my degree will lift a huge weight off my shoulders in so many ways that I can't wait for that day to come. Having to study nights and weekends, I've had to miss lots of fun stuff and nights out with my friends. In fact, it is quite hard to work around my schedule to meet with my friends at all. I'm lucky that I get to see my guy at home every night, or I don't know what I would do. Not only that, but I would not have to work around papers and exams when planning vacations or deciding whether I can go on vacation in the first place. Of course there is also the financial part of getting a degree; finally having one means no more tuition fees.
A mini goal related to this big goal for 2013 is to complete my degree without being a slave to the textbooks. I'm not entirely sure how I can achieve that without having a clone study instead of me, but I will sure as hell try.
2. Do more of the things I love and connect more with the people I love.
This would follow from completing my degree, but I would love it if I could find the time to do more reading, paint more, do more photography, meet more people and hang out with my friends, my guy and my parents more even before I graduate. Life is a lot nicer and I am a lot less cranky when I can spend time doing all those creative things I like to do.
I have been working hard to build a decent body of abstract paintings and collages for an art show, and my goal is to have an art show at some point. This point could be 2013 if I am lucky. I should also finally open an Etsy shop. I'm not sure how often people realize sales of artwork on Etsy, but even one sale would be a huge deal for me, so I should do it soon.
With all this time in the office and in front of the books, I have become somewhat of a hermit. It sucks. I need to expand my horizons, meet new people, find new friends. I have felt a tiny bit lonely in terms of friends lately.
4. Look well-groomed all the time, not just sometimes.
OK, I am allowed one girly resolution for all the hard work I've been doing, and this is it :). I am usually good at this, and I have addressed some issues with my skin this past year, but I have a tendency to put the finer points of my appearance on the back burner when I don't have much time or I am too stressed, which is often lately. I dress well, but when I feel tired I am less likely to think of a great outfit or give myself a facial. I do feel better when I know I have taken good care of myself, so my goal this year would be to try and exhibit the same level of care for myself that I exhibit for studying, for example.
Hopefully these don't look ridiculous to most of you, but even if they do, they are mine and I'll stick with them :) Did you decide on your resolutions for the new year already?