Easter Impressions

I am enjoying the Spring weather this year, even the rainy days. There is something very soothing and rejuvenating about the green grass growing an inch overnight, about the clouds rolling in front of the mountain outside my window, to be chased away by the sun in the afternoon, about the smell of wet earth and the sound of birds chirping. It reminds us that we are alive.

This year I am very very happy with my Easter eggs - normally I can sort of get nice colors in the end, but only after an exhausting afternoon of cursing the egg dyes that refuse to color the eggs, the blue that turns muddy or the yellow, which dyes my hands, but nothing else. This year there were a few dyes that I wasn't so happy about, but all in all, egg painting was surprisingly easy and mishap-free, and it took me only about an hour. Yey!

This Easter was also special because I have now been to Jerusalem and the Church of the Holy Sepulcher, an exotic and very engaging company team building that featured also a tour of Tel Aviv and some beach time at the Dead Sea. I brought back the 33 candles that you are supposed to light from the holy fire in the church and then extinguish, so this year I lit one of these special candles in my house, wishing for love, health and harmony in my home. I need it.

Happy holidays, everyone!

Sunday Morning Rain Is Falling

After an extremely productive Saturday - two presentations written, three loads of laundry done, the first layer of a new painting finished, and my nails manicured :) - my Sunday dawned rainy and slightly lazy. Of course in this case the best thing is to cuddle under a blanket with a book and a cup of tea, which I did for a bit before heading out to lunch.

I was shopping for a gift for a friend of mine on Thursday evening, and after hours of going from store to store and not finding anything she would like, I took a short break and headed to the bookstore to clear my head. I ended up buying a couple of books, and one of them was an amazing edition of E. E. Cummings poems in Bulgarian, published by Жанет 45, which became an instant favorite. The poetry is great (which I knew already), but I was also really impressed by the design of the book and the illustrations by Liuba Haleva. Luxurious paper that feels like satin, a matte laminated cover and thoughtful graphics in red, black, white and gold make the poetry book an experience for all your senses. I loved curling up with it and listening to the rain pattering gently.

Also, I couldn't refrain from sharing a photo of my savory plant - I bought it from a garden store two weeks ago and ever since then it has been growing like crazy, much to my dismay and pleasure, of course. It has brought a definite springtime spirit to my house, and I love it. It smells of new beginnings, and herbs, and nature, and home.

Saturday Trip to the Flower Market

If you are an early riser even on weekends, one of the best places to be on a Saturday morning in Sofia is the flower market Dimitar Petkov. This Saturday was relatively cool, but the sun was shining, so it was a delight to be out and about shopping for veggies and flowers at the market. This past Sunday was Palm Sunday here in Bulgaria, so there were a lot of people buying flowers for their homes or for friends and family that have been named after plants and celebrate their name days on Palm Sunday.

I was actually too busy to take photos, but I snapped a few here and there, and I also have some of the flowers that I arranged in the vases at home. I also got some herbs to plant, but I will go back sometime in the next few weeks to buy more, once the weather warms. Last year was very rainy and my basil died relatively quickly, probably thinking that fall was coming, but this year I'm hoping that there will be enough sun for it to survive longer.

Since today we woke up to a bit of a snowstorm, I thought I'd post my flower snapshots with the hope of chasing away the last cold days and ushering in warmer weather for Easter this weekend. It was a bit depressing to have to dig out my warm fluffy jacket again when it's already April.

Hidden Corners

It turns out that there is a monastery in the neighborhood I live in, and it is a pretty nice one. It's barely even hidden, juts a tiny street off of the main road, but if you don't know that its there, you aren't very likely to just stumble upon it. I love finding hidden corners of a city, gems that you have to work for but that are oh so rewarding. We went there to light a candle on Easter day, and the cool shadows cast by the tall trees around the monastery buildings provided a nice spot to relax. Lately I've been craving the outside, or perhaps I've just been craving the peacefulness of nature on a beautiful day, like that special silence that is not really silence at all because there are leaves rustling and bees buzzing and birds chirping, but it feels like silence because it relaxes your mind. 

I forgot my camera at home, so I actually Instagrammed these photos with my phone. My HTC's camera is not bad, but it's not that amazing either; still, you can get a sense of the atmosphere.

Every day I tell myself that I will try to go out more, to meet more people, to worry less, to be less stressed by work, and yet I don't think I'm very successful. Everything feels like endless work, even this short holiday that we've had (although the phone not ringing alone was simply divine). My parents helped me a lot with the garden, though, and I do believe that in a few more years it will be a real paradise. I have sun loungers, and I hope that I can put them to good use this summer. Perhaps I'll try to study outside for a change.

I can't wait for my summer vacation. Boy have I earned it, and I hope that it is all I hope it would be.

Spring Reflections

There is a quote by Pablo Neruda that goes "I want to do to you what the spring does to the cherry tree." I have always thought that this was one of the most romantic things I have ever heard. It's the fact that someone loves you enough to want to help make your dreams come true, make you bloom. Spring is such a wonderful season of renewal, growth and hope.

And this year I feel like I'm missing it. I've been waiting for spring to come, and somehow I feel like I've missed its arrival, and I will wake up one day and it would have come and gone, and I would have had no time to see it. For various reasons, I haven't been able to go out much, and it's been bothering me, more than I though it would. I am also itching to go out with my camera. So far I have mostly snapped a few shots from around my house; it's still something, I guess.

I hate how I have become a complainer. I try not to do it, but I guess I'm just tired. My mom gets annoyed with me a lot whenever I tell her anything that would hint at me being tired or a bit sad. She keeps scolding me, saying that I have nothing to complain about when compared to other people, and that I am being over-dramatic. That just makes me sadder. I don't know how to explain to people that I am just really deeply tired. I work hard, and often my work day goes beyond my official work hours, and after I go home, I usually study, and then go to bed. That's my usual schedule, apart from a dance class here and there, and perhaps lunch with friends once in a few weeks or the occasional play. And while I'm doing that, I feel like people are living their lives, actually living them - being outside, having fun, going to the movies, partying in clubs, traveling during the weekend. I just don't want to miss out on life, and right at this moment, it feels that way.

I do know that I am lucky in many ways; I have not been saddled with debt, I own my home, I have a job, I am pretty healthy, I am in a good relationship. I am deeply grateful to fate that I have been gifted with these blessings, but sometimes, after an exhausting work and study stretch, I still feel cranky. I guess that this master's degree is turning out to be way more of a challenge than I expected when coupled with my job. It's not that I find the act of studying or the material itself hard. It is that I find the lack of any free time hard when out of seven days I can barely scrape half a day to myself or to spend with the people I love. I am at the final stretch, and I am trying not to get discouraged. Clearly, I am not always successful :)

To those who read this blog (even though you are not that many) sorry for all the whining. I promise a happier topic next time. Maybe I should write post about the 10 great things about working towards an MBA degree. It might help me stay positive :)